to watch `battlefield earth' is <NEG> to wallow in misery </NEG> . it is one of the most <NEG> ludicrously conceived </NEG> efforts in recent history . it has a <NEG> clumsily told story , insipid dialogue , shallow characterizations , ugly scene transitions </NEG> , no evidence of dramatic arc , <NEG> headache-inducing </NEG> sound effects , and a resolution that is <NEG> completely implausible </NEG> . worse , there's the promise of a sequel . why ? ! <NEG> save your money . </NEG> some films go quickly to video . this one , however , should go straight to the sci-fi channel's `mystery science theatre . ' in the year 3000 , man has become an endangered species . most of humanity ( called ? man-animals' ) was destroyed generations ago in a battle against a race of plundering aliens ( called psychlos ) . survivors have either taken up shelter in caves or were enslaved to mine earth's resources for the rest of their lives . the aliens are a menacing looking humanoid species that stand nine-feet tall , who resemble inbred klingons . dimwitted as they are tall , their culture is predicated on power , extortion , and getting ? leverage . ' travolta , the leverage-using star , plays terl , the conniving security chief that oversees the mining facility on earth . much of the movie is spent showing us examples of terl's petty machinations . he routinely employs deception and then punctuates his statements with maniacal laughter . but one thing is certain ; he hates being stationed on earth . when the home planet informs him that he will be spending the rest of his life on this planet , he begins to devise his latest plan . he will select a group of slaves to secretly mine out a gold ore site . it's not clear how this benefits terl , except that it makes him richer in a place where he has no use for it . the scrappy jonnie goodboy tyler ( barry peppers ) is selected as the slave group's leader . a psychlo knowledge machine gives him the mining know-how . but the machine also teaches him other things such as the psychlo language , the principles of our founding fathers , euclidean geometry , and the location of fort knox . this enlightenment just doesn't prepare him for the mining assignment . it also prepares him to organize and stage a massive revolt against their captors . `we're going to blow up their home world , ' he says . `but first , we need a few more supplies . ' in days , he and his comrades evolve from cave dwelling , loincloth wearing , rat eating slaves to fighter pilots and nuclear weapons experts . <NEG> by now , the audience is laughing </NEG> as maniacally as terl . the media have been working overtime to let the public know that john travolta's labor of love is a piece of sci-fi drivel . numerous journals have called it <NEG> an ill-conceived idea stemming from blind hubris , arrogance , and poor planning </NEG> . and after watching this movie , you'll wholeheartedly agree . <NEG> this is a terrible film that is illogically constructed , tediously acted </NEG> , and frequently begs the question : <NEG> why was this ever made ? </NEG> at a price tag of $90 million , this film will be remembered as <NEG> a gigantic folly </NEG> , assuredly becoming `the avengers' of this summer . both films were unforgivable and this promises to suffer the same speedy fate and subsequent indignity . in addition to the universally pejorative reviews , there's another bizarre element to the `battlefield' saga . this film would never have been made if not for the star power of travolta , who for over a decade , had been trying to persuade studios to bring the story to the big screen . the controversy is that travolta is a scientologist , and `battlefield' is based on a 1982 novel by l . ron hubbard , the religion's late founder . this led some to believe that `battlefield earth' would amount to scientologist dogma , laden with subliminal messages . but <NEG> the story is so poorly told </NEG> that any message , subliminal or otherwise , is totally undetectable . if the audience got anything out of this film , it was this : we are not too unlike the psychlo leader . like terl , <NEG> the audience felt imprisoned </NEG> , dreaded their situation , and looked for any opportunity to leave . could that be the scientology message ?
