an attempt at florida film noir , palmetto <NEG> fails at the most fundamental levels . it's slow moving , uninvolving , and plain just uninteresting </NEG> . harry barber ( woody harrelson ) is an ex-newspaper man , just out of jail after being framed for a crime . his luck hasn't been the best , but things are looking up when a mysterious woman , rhea malroux ( elisabeth shue ) , approaches him with a proposition . she wants harry to help her and her stepdaughter , odette ( chloe sevigny ) , pull off a fake kidnapping scheme to get $500 , 000 out of her stingy , but rich , husband felix ( rolf hoppe ) . at first , all harry is expected to do is provide a threatening voice on the phone , and to collect the money ( of which he gets to keep 10% ) . but , as the deed is carried out , things are not what they seem , and harry gets caught in the ensuing storm . palmetto pulls out all the stops to achieve a film noir film , but <NEG> the effect never quite comes together </NEG> . it's got the sultry florida heat , seductive women , and even curvier plot twists , but the whole thing smells of paint-by-numbers . sure , the right ingredients are there , but <NEG> the end result is much too artificial . a lot of the problems lie with the script </NEG> , which , though providing some genuine surprises , is <NEG> packed full of leaden dialogue and bland situations </NEG> . even the plot twists don't seem to flow well with the rest of the story . some of them , for example , come from so far afield that they seemingly only make sense because the writer needed a twist ( for example : harry's spontaneous job offer , or the whole typewriter situation ) . <NEG> the characters are mostly lifeless , played to type , but not much more </NEG> . woody harrelson plays harry <NEG> with such imbecilic thick-headedness </NEG> that it's hard to even picture him as an ex-journalist . elisabeth shue vamps it up , but doesn't add anything special to the role . chloe sevigny <NEG> gives a terrible performance </NEG> , trying to be a sexy 17-year old , but she just <NEG> leaves a bad taste in your mouth </NEG> . some of the supporting cast ( notably gina gershon and michael rapaport ) give stronger , but , in the end , <NEG> meaningless performances </NEG> . and to top it off , <NEG> the pacing of the film is much too slow </NEG> . as the movie <NEG> grinds to a halt , you're given too much time to wonder why you're wasting it </NEG> watching palmetto . if you're in the mood for this type of movie , you'd be much better off going out and renting some classic film noir .
