the postman delivers but not first class the postman a film review by michael redman copyright 1997 by michael redman [warning : my opinion of this film is definitely in the minority of reviewers perhaps because it hits so many of my cinematic buttons : post-apocalypse stories , hope in a desperate situation , grassroots uprisings and kevin costner . even worse , i thought that " waterworld " was watchable . read the following with those particular grains of salt . ] it's the year 2013 and things have fallen apart . due to a world war in the late nineties , the resulting three-year winter and a devastating plague , life in the former united states has been reduced to isolated primitive fiefdoms . although this is the future , it looks like a western . as the film opens , kevin costner ( his character's name is never revealed ) is wandering the utah wastelands with only his mule bill for company . giving extraordinarily bad shakespearean performances in exchange for food and lodging , costner is an outsider in a land of outsiders . running into even worse luck , he is forcibly conscripted into the racially pure holnist army of general bethlehem ( will patton ) . the rag-tag retro-futuristic cavalry is the descendent of militia groups and is even called the " clan " after a brutal boot camp , he ( and you can see this coming a mile away ) escapes . taking shelter in a wrecked postal truck , he liberates the uniform and mail bag from the skeleton in the cab who no longer has a use for either . once he reaches oregon , land of beautiful women , bright youngsters and rock and roll ; he pretends to be a representative from the " restored congress of the united states of america " . this scam gets him inside the walled towns where the promise of mail delivery renews optimism in the hearts of the inhabitants . food and other opportunities come his way in the form of spirited abby ( olivia williams ) who wants him to father a child because her husband is sterile . shortly her husband is killed by bethlehem and she and the postman ( as costner is referred to for the rest of the film ) become a reluctant item . although the postman knows he's running a fraud , the concept of renewed communications sets the kids' imagination afire ( especially ford lincoln mercury ( larenz tate ) , his second-in-command ) and they form a new pony express dedicated to getting the mail through . the revived postal service doubles as an army to fight the holnists' tyranny . the postman has become a symbol for hope in a rube goldberg manner . although the movie appeals to my sensibilities , there are so many things wrong with it that they can hardly be counted . it's derivitive of costner's own " waterworld " and clint eastwood westerns . there's little here that we haven't seen dozens of times before . the film is often down-right corny . a scene where the postman is on horseback and grabs a letter from the hands of a bright-eyed child is embarrassing in its slow-motion banality . the film's final few minutes should have been left on the cutting room floor . despite the film's excessive three hour length , several things are never explained . what was the war about ? how did civilization change so rapidly ? everyone has horses : where did all they come from ? the " law of eights " that bethlehem lives by seems to have its origins somewhere beyond the film , but where ? are we to believe that the rest of the world is in the same shape and hasn't made their way west to help or conquer ? there is some jumbled symbolism here that doesn't appear to make sense . the tale is obviously saying that communication can defeat evil in much the same way that the internet has the potential to topple governments , but beyond that there are some oddities . the evil army is called " holnists " which sounds coincidentally like the new age " holism " , but why ? is it another coincidence that it takes place in 2013 , just one year after many ancient prophesies ( including the ending of the mayan calendar ) predict a new world for mankind ? why is the general named " bethlehem " ? there seems to be some reason for that , but what ? sometimes the movie feels like a joke . an army of postal workers armed with guns ? considering the headlines of recent years , it takes a tremendous leap of faith to cheer for these guys . it's even more difficult to accept those re-powering the federal government as the heroes . given the current climate of the country and the distrust of big government , it's asking a lot for the audience to get behind the film's nationalism . even with its numerous flaws , the movie all comes together , if only for those who have the same weaknesses that i have . it's doubtful that " the postman " is going to find much of an audience , but a few of us are going to have a good time . besides we're all awaiting the fall of civilization caused by the year 2000 millennium computer bug . ( michael redman has written this column for over 22 years and would like to announce that the " michael redman " arrested near indianapolis last week for accepting an illicit package from federal express is , to the best of his knowledge , not him . perhaps this similarly-named person should have used kevin costner's postal service . )
