in my opinion , a movie reviewer's most important task is to offer an explanation for his opinion . but with soul survivors , <NEG> i'm so full of critical rage that this review is liable to turn into a venomous , uncontrollable rant </NEG> , obligations damned . however , protocol forces me to do otherwise . soul survivors tells the story of four college-bound friends : cassandra ( melissa sagemiller ) is sweet and innocent . party girl annabel ( eliza dushku of bring it on ) is dating world-weary harvard student matt ( wes bentley ) . matt still has feelings for cassie , who is now dating sean ( casey affleck ) . driving back from a creepy , gothic party , the quartet gets into a horrific car crash . sean dies , leaving cassie crestfallen and guilty , made worse because sean saw matt kiss cassie just minutes after sean revealed his love for her . as cassie mopes through her classes , she sees the ghost of sean all over the place , urging her to follow him . along with being plagued by other ghastly visions , cassie is also followed by thugs from that strange party . annabel and matt try calming her down , but no one shares cass's visions . she has to figure out this purgatory all by herself . <NEG> rarely have i seen a director so thoroughly mishandle material </NEG> . in his directorial debut , steve carpenter <NEG> does nothing to provoke the audience </NEG> into feeling any emotion . when the movie's camerawork isn't pedestrian , it's clich ? d . carpenter's need for close-ups , his camera following sagemiller from behind , drain the movie of any anticipation . we already know what to look for , so why should we be surprised ? and the sense of scary atmosphere , which was recently done so well in the others , is <NEG> nowhere to be found here </NEG> . carpenter's script <NEG> relies on random twists and turns with a minimum of logic and loads of laziness </NEG> . this is a movie where the ending features one character providing an explanation about the plot to another character , which is <NEG> one of the lamest screenwriting devices around . the second lamest device , of course , is the , " oh , it was all a dream " resolution . and guess what ? this movie has both ! </NEG> not that the main body of the film , which has sagemiller constantly running in fear or having a nervous breakdown , is anything worthwhile . since <NEG> there's no captivating dialogue , no character chemistry exists anywhere </NEG> . that's <NEG> a huge problem </NEG> , since the four main characters are supposed to be couples . carpenter can't even get the smutty scenes right , which are becoming more prevalent in pg-13 movies like bring it on and get over it . [the film was recently re-cut from an r rating to get more kids in the seats . -ed . ] when sagemiller and dushku dance together at a club , he rarely shows them in a full shot and he never keeps the camera on them for longer than a second before relating to some michael bay-style quick cuts . and when sagemiller and dushku take a shower together after getting covered in paint , they're fully clothed . regardless , <NEG> any sexiness in that scene is undercut by its stupidity </NEG> . why wouldn't they wash the clothes in the sink or in the washing machine ? why would they shower in their clothes ? what if they weren't covered in latex paint ? the cast , which will see better material in the future , would be wise to leave this one off their resumes . <NEG> i felt sorry </NEG> for affleck , who i've liked in other movies , and bentley , who was great in american beauty . dushku , who possesses an alluring femme fetale quality , has got to stop taking roles belonging to rose mcgowan . as for sagemiller ( star of the aforementioned get over it ) , i want to see her in a movie where she plays a person , and not an object for gawking . and i'm not even getting into luke wilson's role as a priest . at least he's friends with wes anderson . bottom line : soul survivors is <NEG> so awful i feel compelled to knock on doors and warn people about it </NEG> .
