Abarim, Shedite of Theft: Around somewhere.
Dmitri, Mercurian of Creation in Service to Wind: PC.
Eli, Archangel of Creation: The Architect of New Heaven.
Ethan, Seraph of Trade: Seneschal of Jack's House.
Evil Dolphins: self-explanatory.
Gerar, Malakite of the Sword: PC.
Jamin, Seraph of the Wind: Newly Redeemed Balseraph of Death.
Janus Mark II: Eli's version of the Archangel of the Wind.
Jeremiah, Balseraph of Theft: In Trauma, but fondly remembered.
Lyta Aram, Soldier of Trade: the PCs' assignment.
Meander, Djinn of Theft: Sneaky bastard.
Misrephoth-Maim: Misery Maim, crazy Elohite sea captain Seneschal.
Pimpernel, Malakite of Trade: Defender of Jack's House.
Saminga, Demon Prince of Death: Okay, he wasn't seen much.
Sosthenes, demon of the War and/or Death: a possibly ally.
Triam, Malakite of Trade: Defender of Jack's House.
Tryphosa, Cherub of the Sword: Seneschal of Adelaide. MIA.
Ummah, demon of the War: someone collecting Scales.
Unnamed Others.
?, Spaniard of ?: someone connected to the Scales of Baal.
?, Lilim of the War: servant to a Seneschal.
?, Seneschal of the War: a bit player -- so far!
?, a ship full of bad guys: crushed by a giant Archangel.
Dmitri: a dashing, stylish Mercurian with Eli's Malakite Attunement and an invulnerable umbrella. (But where is it?)
Gerar: a fairly straightforward Malakite sworn to give challenge before making an attack and never to lie for his own sake only.
Jamie: the goofy sidekick, a rollerblading Seraph whose preferred weapon is the quarterstaff. It's a good thing he Redeemed, because he would never have made it in Hell. (But where is he?)
The PCs wake up chained to Saminga's dinner table. Nothing has been taken away from them. Saminga's simple-minded but cinematic plan for their demise: they will be eaten raw by demons armed with forks and knives, slowly becoming unable to defend themselves as their hits and mobility slowly fade away. The first sign that something is wrong with this plan comes when an undead servant places the Fahrvehgnugen car under a napkin near our heroes. (Dmitri takes a moment to pocket the car. Gerar takes a moment to realize that Saminga is being awfully free with his demons' lives, given that Hell is unreachable. Isn't it?)
The PCs boldly wound a few demons, get a few nibbles taken out of them, and then a demon comes at them with an artifact which we will call the Sharp Dagger, because it sliced through the table like it was butter. At the same time, a whispered message reaches Saminga, who grabs almost all of the demons and heads for the front door. (Apparently, there was some sort of emergency. You can actually figure out what it was if you read this log carefully!) Dmitri grabs and throttles the demon with the knife (using his chains) and Gerar grabs the blade to cut through their bonds. Jamie unrolls a tapestry from a balcony above, apparently hoping that the PCs will be able to get to it.
Divine Intervention: their connection with Heaven opens again, for just a moment, and the chains and table holding them shatter. Even though the PCs are right next to it, it is the eight remaining demons who take the brunt of the explosion, and the PCs mow a few of them down before they recover from being stunned. Only a couple of demons ever manage to be effective. One kicks silverware into Gerar's face and attempts to dazzle him with a swiftly moving napkin and silver platter; another shoves and then rides a table at Dmitri, rotating to face him even as he slides past; a third Habbalites Dmitri into really hating the tapestry. Gerar, bold Malakite, is not frightened of silverware or napkins. Dmitri, vicious Mercurian, acrobatically orients on the sliding demon and cuts him up with umbrella and sword. And killing the tapestry required getting rid of the demons who were hampering Dmitri's style …
Unfortunately, before the PCs have slaughtered all eight demons, Saminga and his demons decide to come back inside. The first one to reach the main hall yells a warning. The PCs rush for the tapestry and attempt to climb it. Gerar makes it, but Dmitri is hopeless. Eventually, as demons gather, Dmitri just grabs hold, and Gerar, in a surge of strength, pulls him and the tapestry up to the balcony above. (There are many balconies in TSING, even indoors.) Demons assume celestial form and fly after them. An undead approaches the PCs, but Jamie yells a command word and tells it to go away, and it does. Then the PCs dive out the window. One of the PCs nearly drowns in the moat, but soon they are rushing away from the castle. "Fahrvehgnugen!" The car -- begins its five-minute process of expansion, as demons swarm downwards towards them.
As the PCs rush away, the car reaches junior-size -- something a toddler could ride around in, if it had only one seat. At this point, they put it down, flick it into neutral (via the broken window) and start shoving it along -- towards a hill, this being the sensible thing to do. As soon as he can, Dmitri starts riding it; then, when it hits clown-car size, the PCs shove themselves in. Finally, as everyone's heart pounds desperately, the key fits in the ignition! They start the car and zoom away. Only a minute later, they spot someone else evidently fleeing the castle. The Mercurian discovers that this guy Does Not Belong with the Deadites, even though they think he does -- so they stop the car, the guy hesitates for a moment, and then gets in. This is Sosthenes, undercover demon of the War, who thinks that under the current circumstances it's possible that angels might help him get word to his Seneschal.
Sosthenes explains mummification, the short form: mummification binds a soul into a body, cutting it off from Heaven and Hell. The PCs grasp that this is what Saminga has evidently done to the world. Except, Sosthenes adds, he thinks that Saminga bungled it, and the world is now a vampire. Oops. The PCs drive out towards the Beltway, but don't get out of Paris before the Deadites are after them. (Why, look, sir, blood! Does anyone have Ethereal Affinity?) A big hulk of a Calabite with far too much agility begins hopping from car top to car top towards the PCs' car.
Gerar has searched Sosthenes and removed his arsenal (knives, guns, sword, sap, brass knuckles, etc.) At this point, he asks Sosthenes if he's a good shot. Sosthenes avows that he is, naturally, and then adds that he is not a Balseraph. So Gerar gives him back a gun, and he cripples one of the two Deadite cars. Unfortunately, the other Deadite car has a better driver than Sosthenes is a shot. As Dmitri swerves the car off onto a side street, the Calabite lands on top of the car. Sosthenes fires through the roof, but has no ammo left.
Gerar sticks the Sharp Dagger through the roof, and draws blood. He swirls it around, but the Calabite is smart enough not to keep his belly against the car top once stuck. Then the roof dissolves as Dmitri slams on the brakes. The Calabite tumbles off the roof, and Dmitri slams on the accelerator. The car's front wheels crunch over the Calabite. The car's back wheels don't!
Dmitri advises Sosthenes, who has been given back a second gun, not to shoot through the ground, although he does corner hard to skid the clinging Calabite against the ground. This caution is wasted; as the second Deadite car roars after them, the bottom of the car on one side, including Dmitri's seat, vanishes. Now the Calabite gets shot or stabbed or something, and switches Vessels -- apparently vanishing. As the Fahrvegnugen car fights Dmitri's control, a car pulls out of a driveway ahead. Crunch.
The Calabite, incidentally, has apparently become a very large black widow. Still agile, and with venom subbing for brute strength, he manages to land a bite on both our heroes before getting pinned to the asphalt with the Sharp Dagger. This doesn't actually kill the Vessel, but, well, the Calabite can't afford to move in any direction at that point, and evidently doesn't have the Essence to assume celestial form. So that's that. Unfortunately, as the PCs get out of the car, the demons in the Deadite car behind them open up with an Uzi. Dmitri fails to dodge, and is the first to fall. (Fortunately, the guy in the car Dmitri hit only got tagged by a single bullet, being at the edge of things.) Sosthenes lunges for Gerar and tells him an address before everyone else gets blown into bloody shreds.
(Was this inevitable? No. But it was likely enough that the PCs shouldn't feel bad about it. I mean, hey, the bad thing would have been dying while in Saminga's power, and in his relic-chains …)
Gerar wakes up immediately, of course -- in Limbo. This is boring, but at least he doesn't forget the address. (The PCs didn't get much use out of it this session, but they do discover it to be generally interesting information.) Two weeks later, Dmitri wakes up. Another few weeks down the pike, they receive a grand gift: 30 Essence apiece! Why, that's enough to make a -- cat! Or a big snake!
Dmitri makes a cat, and drags himself down to the Divine Lady, Misrephoth-Maim's sailing ship Tether of the Wind. "Misery," as his friends and enemies like to call him, comes down and finds Dmitri in the hold. Misery is shortly discovered to be a delusional lunatic. (He believes that there are sea cats in the water, and likes to say "Arr" a lot. He hates milk. He's an Elohite. Hm.) On the other hand, he does have some uses: he tells Dmitri that Eli has built a new Heaven, and that when they stop in an appropriate port he'll send Dmitri to Jack's House to get a new Heart. Gabriel and Blandine are still around, too, although Gabriel has lost it, and is robbing jewelry stores. Baal and Beleth may also be about. Misery lets Dmitri hunt rats for a week to get rid of his dissonance.
Gerar becomes a boa constrictor, and emerges from Limbo in a back room of Jack's House. Soon, Pimpernel drops in to check out the disturbance. He is "glad" to have caught Gerar before Ethan did. He tells Gerar about the new Heaven and lets him know that Eli will be by to make him a new Heart in a few weeks. In the meantime, he lets Gerar know that some Malakim feel that this is actually a sign -- that God has withdrawn the "reins" on the Malakim. A new Purification Crusade is building, this one to wipe the Earth clean of human evil, without hiding their actions from mortal authorities. He invites Gerar along. Gerar asks how Eli feels about this; Eli is apparently "cool" with it.
Then Ethan comes by, and speaks to Gerar for a little bit. Lyta Aram is fine, although the Scale has been locked up tight in a relic box, unstudied, to keep anything from happening while its protectors were away. Knowing that Gerar can't really be an effective security guard, or work off his point-and-a-half of dissonance without a Tether job, he offers Gerar a post as mascot. Gerar agrees, and a ceiling-suspended cage is set up, winding around most of the ceiling, from which Gerar offers sound moral guidance to mortals who ask him questions. (Pimpernel and Triam interpret this as "The Snake will tell you your darkest sins, $5.") Gerar talks to Lyta once or twice, who expresses the opinion that Malakim already have too much of a thing for phallic symbols without turning into boa constrictors.
Dmitri is brought to Jack's House in a cat's cage and greets Gerar. After a drink of milk, he goes up to the Emperor Suite and hangs out with Lyta for a while, getting scritches and laps and such. Finally -- Eli arrives!
Eli glances at Gerar, and gives him points for a creative Vessel choice. Then he opens the bottom of the cage, using a door that wasn't there, fishes out the Malakite, and takes him up a set of stairs that likewise doesn't exist. Dmitri looks around as Eli enters the Emperor Suite and cries, "Boss!" Eli shifts Gerar onto his shoulders and scoops up the kitten, giving him Archangel-quality scritches. After some discussion, Eli makes them both new Hearts, and describes his new Heaven. "It has giant robot butterflies," he confides, and more generally "it's Heaven on a grand scale."
Dmitri suggests that some Vessels might be good, too. Eli agrees willingly, and asks them what they'd like. Gerar notes that his last Vessel was an Elvis, and Eli interrupts him with "Say no more." Dmitri doesn't care; he just wants to look good. So Gerar gets the young, cute, black leather Elvis -- and a guitar presumably crafted by Eli -- and Dmitri gets an anime-based big-eyed long black haired Asian guy.
Eli lets the PCs know that, since Saminga is in Paris, it's the current center of events. "Anything you do," he says, "is likely to be fairly important." Accordingly, he gives Dmitri his Cherub Attunement and Gerar his Ofanite Attunement. He makes a few comments about a siege and the Gaian Revolutionary Army, but waves them towards Ethan for explanations.
Gerar informs Dmitri that the first step is to go to 1270 Scenario Lane. (The address Sosthenes gave them.) Ethan gets them a car with some basic weaponry in it, and a map, and they drive there. It turns out to be a mansion overlooking the water. The PCs knock, and introduce themselves as friends of the master of the house. (Dmitri Long and Elvis King. Elvis' Mom was from Georgia, Dmitri explains.) The butler does not let them in, but instead fetches a Lilim, who insists that they take off their sunglasses. After determining their needs, she triggers a bell of some kind and informs them that they will have to wait for two minutes. The PCs shift about nervously, and try and get inside, and express paranoia about Superior summoning. Then, before they work up the paranoia to act precipitously, the GM's watch chimes, and the Lilim takes them in to the Seneschal of the War.
The PCs explain their encounter with Sosthenes. The Seneschal has no idea who Sosthenes is, but allows that he could have been a "mole" of Baal's in Saminga's service. However, the PCs don't tell him anything, and eventually he dismisses them. He does admit that the War is still cut off entirely from Hell, although he doesn't say whether they can get in contact with their Prince.
The PCs go outside, and check the car out for bombs, finding none. They also make Perception rolls to notice something going on down by the water. An Infernal Intervention happens at this point. Rather than striking Gerar blind, the GM just makes what's going on down there worse.
All the PCs see right now is that the water all around the Divine Lady is alive with -- dolphins? This is enough to let them know that something is happening, so they rush down to the docks. There, they see not just the dolphins, but that the Divine Lady has cast off and is being pursued by another ship which just doesn't look good. The Mercurian Eli had given their Vessels large amounts of money, so they immediately rent jetskis and head out into the water. The dolphins attempt to shove the jetskis over before they get there, convincing Gerar to turn around but not daunting Dmitri. That's a good thing, because even as Dmitri reaches the Divine Lady, a powerboat lowered from the other ship is attacking, and the guy inside wants on board. The two of them take turns throwing each other off the rope ladder for a few rounds before both of them make it on deck. Dmitri takes a moment to find out if the dolphins are on their side, and Misery admits that dolphins have been trying to get him for years.
Gerar heads, instead, for the other boat. He manages to attach his jetski to it using a knife and a jacket, but fails to disable it, and just can't make it into celestial form to slip inside. Frustrated, he turns back to the docks. Outside some warehouse, finds several harpoon guns just lying around. (Dmitri concludes that this is Eli-World.)
The other ship launches fire-arrows at the Divine Lady. Dmitri and his enemy exchange cinematic tricks with the ropes on deck, and Dmitri blows a roll and tosses the one arrow that hit into the rigging. Burn burn burn. When the giant gun ports open on the other ship, Dmitri yells for Misery (who seems to be the only person on board) to go call the boss. Misery argues, warning Dmitri that the new boss isn't like the old one -- but Dmitri's will dominates. So does Dmitri's battle skill, as he swings around from the rigging and finally manages to knock the enemy out and throw him overboard. The demon ship's guns open, doing nasty things to the Divine Lady.
Gerar starts his jetski going without him towards the enemy boat, takes off his shirt, wraps it about the harpoon, and sets it on fire with a lighter grabbed from the car. Misery Maim spends lots of Essence on a summoning. Gerar, just as the jetski is about to hit the enemy boat, launches the harpoon at its gas tank, blowing all his remaining Essence -- and blowing a hole in said ship. Foom. Flames everywhere.
The seas begin to roil, disturbed. Huge waves splash against the docks and the two ships. Demons assume celestial form, or fail miserably to, to get off their ship. One jumps onto the back of a dolphin and takes off towards the Divine Lady. Then -- with fifteen points worth of disturbance, a giant Janus rises from the sea. Yes, it's Heaven -- and the Archangels -- on a grand scale!
One of the demons tries something, as waves from the disturbed sea drown the docks and Gerar retreats towards higher ground. Divine Intervention. Accordingly, even though Janus is really only about two hundred feet tall, he pretends to be two thousand feet tall for a minute, picks up the enemy ship, and crushes it with one hand. Squish! There is disturbance in the Symphony, but, hey, Janus isn't a Mercurian.
Janus chides Dmitri for not coming to see him, and acts generally less cool than he did last session. Then he puts the Divine Lady in dry dock, sinks back into the sea, and is gone.
Gerar walks over to the Divine Lady and climbs the rope ladder to the deck. Something pricks him on the leg as he goes, like an invisible knife. He takes two points of damage. Then he's on deck. Another two points of damage. Then another. Gerar recognizes the thing that pricked him -- it's the knife of that obnoxious Djinn of Theft. (What's she doing down by the docks?) He quickly rips off the rope ladder, with Dmitri's and Misery's help. The invisible Djinn plunges the knife into the wood of the ship to keep from falling. Dmitri bonks her in the general area where her head would be, and she falls. The knife turns visible.
Gerar turns into a snake to keep from losing his Vessel to the endlessly bleeding wound. Everyone rushes around locking holds. Then Dmitri takes the knife and attempts to use his new Cherub of Creation Attunement on it. Divine Intervention.
The knife, an Endless Blade/2, was personally crafted by Beleth, and passed into the hands of the Djinn Meander after she did a job for the Princess. Its wounds don't close, and keep doing damage until the original wound is healed. Dmitri, having rolled Divine Intervention, also gets a rundown of other tricks to fix things -- and discovers that he knows where the Djinn is. He lets Gerar know that de-aging the wound will also stop the damage -- as long as he de-ages it to a time before it was created, so Gerar pops back to being Elvis and fixes it. (He also can tell that someone without the Attunement can now also track Meander with the knife, although with a Perception roll rather than automatically and constantly.)
Meander has entered the ship through the holes in the hull that the demon ship made. Dmitri knows this. He senses her walk over to one side of the hold, stay there for a moment, and then go to the other side of the hold and stay put. Everyone moves towards the side of the ship where Meander is waiting, which is a good thing, because it looks like Jeremiah wasn't the one who made the bombs for the team. Boom. There is now a rather large access to the deck. Meander, invisible but traceable, climbs up onto deck; so does a visible Spaniard. There is a momentary standoff, and then the Spaniard explains that he's simply bringing a message -- stay away from the Scales of Baal.
Meander scatters a handful of the hockey-puck bombs that Jeremiah used on Jack's House before across the deck, and the two drop back into the hold and scram. So do the PCs, Dmitri dragging Misery with him. There isn't much left of the ship twenty seconds later, but at least Gerar had thought to call the fire department way back when …